Saturday, April 24, 2010

Silly Girl, Pretty Girl

"You know what they say, if you kill a cow, make a hamburger."
Okay, it's either Lady Gaga is trying to be funny or she's on crack. I mean, that doesn't make sense, don't you think so ?

Here comes a long post *thumps*

Starting this post with a round of applause to yours truly, for studying yesterday night til 3 in the morning. Oh please, it was worth it ! And I just realized, my mood to study is much better when I'm not in the mood. Cause well, when I'm not in the mood, I won't have the mood (of course) to do anything so I'll end up studying. Mhmm, I shall make myself mood-less more often then *rubs chin*
Regarding my studies, I made a deal with mom. The deal is, if I start to motivate myself and study more, she'll give me the green light to go out on weekends. It probably is the best deal I've ever made with mom since she always comes up with ridiculous deals, no kid.
I told mom that it's a good deal. I mean, I do want to go out and have a tad of freedom. While doing that, I will definitely motivate myself, right ? Plus, I've set a goal. This upcoming Diagnostic, I shall bring it and hit it with my best shot ! Yezzaaaaa.
Ok, out of a sudden, I feel so alive o.o

Moving on...

A few days ago, I had a conversation with Harisah. It was about EGO. C'mon, if you know me so well, you'll know that Ego runs in my blood, I admit, hands down. On the contrary, being ego doesn't mean that I don't have self-awareness. I'm not that stupid to not realize my mistakes. Seeing a person who's obviously wrong and just did a mistake but still being so self-righteous, is just so annoying. Don't waste your time proving you're right when it's TOO obvious that you're wrong, true true ? Okay.
Sorry, back to the topic.
Harisah has the calculation of -1% egoism. She said she'll back down when it comes to arguments, no matter what. Yes, no matter what ! It doesn't matter if she's right. Honestly, I can never be like that hahaha. I will fight for my rights no matter what. When someone tells me to wave the white flag, even if I'm innocent, oh go fly a kite please k thanks.
That's just one of my characteristic. You don't know my other characteristics ; Sensitive, stubborn, etc. The dark side of me might not be pretty but well, I might have a bright side too you know ;)

I seriously think that I get this firing-back attitude from my sister. Hoho, don't mess with her. She might just bash your face with a baseball bat. You might want to close your ears when she starts cursing and fire back. Mhmm the reason why I hate the fact that she was a tomboy. Old habits die hard right ? Yes, this old habit of hers most probably is the hardest habit to get rid of.
But then, come to think of it, I can't brag about it cause I've been following her footsteps since I was.. 7 ? Yes, I was a clone of her haha. You can say that I was a tomboy but if you say that I still am, go run around naked please. I am not. I don't wear baggy jeans with t-shirt anymore, I don't dress like a boy anymore. I might have that attitude where I curse and talk unlike a girl, but that doesn't mean anything okay ? I have my moments.
I still remember when I was 12, there was this dude. He disturbed the crap out of Dydy and it pissed me off like hell ! He didn't have the freaking rights to tell her what to do and what not to do. Pantang gila orang yang kacau best friend sendiri -.- So there you go, kena maki kat tepi dewan hahahaha. Imma reminisce about it later with Dydy. Old times :')

Woah, so 'inspirational' la up here hahaha.

I skipped school for two days ; On Friday and today.
On Friday, just because I felt like it. And I wanted to help mom running the errands. So tiring okay. We went to the supermarket then we went back and forth from the hospital and back home. I pity mom :/ She had been running to and fro every morning. With her weak knees and weak hips, it must have been exhausting. But it's okay, now my dad and my grandma are back home. So I have to be dad's part-time worker, getting this and that.
Today, I skipped school cause I knew there wouldn't be a lot of people going. Plus mom dragged me to the hospital around 4am. It was a huge annoyance cause i) I was already fast asleep for an hour ii) I was having my period cramps. As you guys might be imagining right now, yes I went to the hospital with sepet eyes (lagi sepet daripada normal eyes and mata masa senyum k), hair all messed up and my hands on the lower part of my stomach &^%$#

Haihh, I'm exhausted, lack of sleep and I am walking around, carrying a huge amount of problems that have the weight of the world on my shoulders. I've never ever felt this fucked up before. With dad and grandma being sick, with mom having aches everywhere, with my grades that are slacking, with the drastic change between me and him, I can't wait to get over April. I definitely will and am hoping for a miracle in May *fingers crossed*

New addictions : i) Jason Castro - Let's Just Fall In Love Again
ii) Joshua Radin feat. Ingrid Michaelson - Sky
iii) David Ryan Harris - Pretty Girl
iv) Paolo Nutini - Candy
v) Black Eyed Peas - Rock That Body
TUNE IN ! Sway to the first four songs and do the jig to the last song, just like I do :)

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